Ugh. My son wants to play Magic: The Gathering

Burning MoneyOut of the blue Owen, our 9 year old in 4th grade, mentions to me today, ‘My friend J**** plays Magic: The Gathering and I want to spend all my back-due allowance and savings on this box of assorted cards I found on ebay’.

Sigh. <shakes fist and curses the fates> Seriously? I’ve never even mentioned this game to him. He’s bought some Pokemon cards over the years but never showed interest in actually playing the game (possibly cause I never showed interest either). But now thanks to school and friends, my apathy and dislike of this type of game can no longer protect him.

(I also had no idea he knew how to find stuff on ebay, but that’s is a whole other issue)

To put this into context for those of you who don’t know this, this is a game I played, and frankly spent way too much money on, in the early 90’s while I was working at Antioch College and hanging out with those pesky students that played cool games. This was pretty much the primary game many of us played for a few years there. After my friends all graduated and left town it was a sad realization that I had all these cards, that I had spent more than I care to admit on, and no one to play games with. So shortly before we moved to Maine I sold all the cards that had any value and threw the rest in boxes.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s a great game that involves strategy and creativity. With Owen’s interest in math and fantasy worlds it’s probably a good match on some levels, but it also requires a bunch of expensive cards or at least there’s built in ‘Oh if I just spent a little more I’ll get some better cards and I’ll have more fun’ pressures inherent in the game.

Oh and it never ends, you can’t just ‘buy them all’ and be done, they keep releasing new sets of cards every few months and thus you need to keep spending more more more to stay current. Oh and there’s an extensive set of rules you need to know to play the game, so you cant just casually play it a little, you need burn lots of time on learning it all to really be good at it.

This is why I haven’t ever played this game with him and why I’m groaning to see him not only getting interested but, worst of all, seeing him starting to burn what little money he has on it.

So when I get home from work he tells me he wants these cards and even goes so far to hand me a wad of cash and says ‘This plus the back allowance you owe me covers the cost of what I want to get’

No amount of explaining that A) These are probably from older sets thus harder to use now, B) This is a waste of money IMHO and C) You don’t even know how to play the game! D) These are just lame common & uncommon cards .. and any other arguments I could think of… could sway his ‘But you said I can spend my money on what I want!’ arguments. It’s true, we said that. Sigh.

The chorus from an old Kenny Rogers song echoes in my head now as I enter my paypal password to buy this box of cards;

Promise me son not to do the things I’ve done, walk away from trouble if you can

Though, to be fair, I guess old habits die hard, I have to admit I haven’t volunteered to give my remaining old cards I haven’t touched in 15 years to him yet.

Maybe I can sell them on ebay? 🙂

OR .. it might be kind of fun to play again.

Oh. No. Help! I think I need an intervention!

Inbox Zero – A never ending battle

I mentioned a few days ago that one of my goals is to get more organized and that one of the things I’m trying to do is Inbox Zero. This is really a pretty simple concept, your inbox should be for incoming e-mail only and should be empty when you’re done. Your goal is to take each message and either;

  1. Trash it
  2. Archive it in an ARCHIVE folder
  3. Reply to it & then archive it
  4. If it’s a message you need to save and reference quickly for a little bit, like an online receipt, plane reservation etc then move it to a HOLD folder
  5. If you don’t have time to reply, but you need to, move it to a FOLLOWUP folder.
  6. Put newsletters/blog entries you want to read later in a REAMDE folder  Ok I admit it, I cheated with this, this isn’t an official “Zero Inbox” folder and I’m sure Merlin Mann would scold me. However, there are messages I want to read more thoroughly some day but I don’t have time to read right now, so I made a ‘README’ folder. This is admittedly just another archive since I rarely read anything in there, but it helped me get it out of my inbox so… don’t judge me)

I’m sure some people are wondering why I’m making this seem like a big deal. Realize that I use e-mail for communications not just with friends & family but also for many work related needs, so I literally get several hundered messages each day. Seriously.

So… I’ve gotten really good at emptying my inbox. Part of this is just diligence that it’s a routine I’m used to. Part of this is actually unsubscribing from mailing lists I never read or from e-mail newsletters/ads from businesses I don’t care that much about.

A few mantras I repeat to myself as I’m sorting my e-mail;

  • I am not the internet archive – I am a admittedly a digital packrat, I tend to save way too much e-mail. Part of this involved me saving messages to mailing lists I’m on cause I or others might need to reference an old post someday. So I had to force myself to remember ;
    • The lists are archived elsewhere
    • It’s not my job to save this, no one else is expecting me too
    • I’m wasting my time/space saving something I’ll likely never need
    • … oh AND the messages weren’t really that important anyways
  • I have more important things to do – For messages that have a subject I’m only kind of interested in, I need to remember I have a to-do list of more important things to do than read messages that aren’t immediately relevant. There is no quiz later proving I read each and every message that came into my mailbox. If it’s not a personal message, odds are there’s little or nothing in it I care about. If I really think I should read it later I put it in my README folder.
  • I can find it later – This is for messages archive. If it’s a message I feel I should save for later, for whatever reason, part of what helps me get this out of my inbox is that I remind myself ‘I can find this later if I need it’.
  • Trash is a 30 day archive – My trash is set to auto-delete any messages after 30 days. Therefore, for things like logs and such where I may need to reference them soon but not save them forever, I remind myself ‘Well, I can always find it in my trash folder if I need it’. I feel a bit of a hypocrit saying this since I have, on several occasions in my previous job, lectured people that they shouldn’t keep important documents in their trash folder etc (seriously, people did this) so I remind myself before I ever do this ‘This document isn’t that important anyways, even if it was lost’

So as I’ve mentioned I’ve gotten pretty good at trimming down my inbox, but now I’ve got way too much stuff in my ‘followup’ folder, and it’s a little scary to go look in there cause unlike my previous inbox, everything in my followup folder really needs my time & attention. It’s like walking into a crowded room of people who need to talk to you (yikes, that’s a scary visual for me). I’m still figuring out plans on how to deal with organizing and ‘zero’-ing this mailbox, what I’ve come up with so far is;

  • If it’s a bigger task, add it to my Asana.com to-do list. Yes, this is like moving it to yet another folder, I know, but by promoting to this level I’m acknowledging it’s really a priority and I can rank it in comparison to other tasks. I can also invite others to this project if it’s something bigger than just me.
  • Schedule It – I haven’t done this much yet, but I know it’s the next step. Actually setting aside time for a task to get it done.
  • For e-mail replies, I need to remember ‘Brevity is the soul of wit’, or perhaps K.I.S.S (Keep it Simple Stupid), I don’t need to write an essay, a few short sentances is probably enough. If an e-mail really requires an essay response then it’s probably a project that should be prioritized and possibly scheduled.

I’ll let you know when/if my followup folder gets organized. I’ll put ‘write a followup blog entry’ on my to do list right now 🙂